Can I just start out by saying that several of the last blogs have been done in my bed because I can't sleep. I can feel the proverbial "tug" of the great and mighty Holy Spirit on my heart. Tonight was no different. For some reason I could not get my blog out of my head. I just tossed and turned in my bed, watched some Beth Moore videos on my phone, listened to my music, and finally, went and got my laptop. I sat here thinking, (to God of course) "Okay, here I am, what do You want me to write about".... and as simply as I am typing I felt the impression of that wonderful and mighty Holy Spirit say "your purpose". So here it goes....
A constant, maybe even permanent, struggle of my Christian life has been my purpose. What is my purpose? Why did God chose me? Why did He create me and decide to allow ME to be included in His work? Who am I? What can I do? What good am I too Him? Where is my place? and even if I knew then How can I? Do you struggle with any of these questions? These are questions I ask myself daily, sometimes, more than 10 times a day!
I, like many of you, am a parent and a wife. To me, these are my most important ministries! Being who I was created to be for them. The other human beings God allowed in His creation and placed in my care! While this is a huge responsibility and I thank God for it daily.... i want more!! Please don't take that the wrong way. I am more than grateful for what God has given me in my family and I know I am more than undeserving of the Grace He has bestowed on me. I just don't want that to be it. I want to be more for Him. I want to show Him that I can do anything He needs me to. Wherever He needs me to go, whoever He needs me to talk to, however far, however hard, however long....I will go! For so long, that has been my search. My internal search and prayer.... "God, show me, tell me...I will listen, I will go"
But then I realized....that was it!! He only wants to know we are willing. Listen, we all can't be a "Beth Moore". Some of us, me included, may only be "mom", "dear", "sister", "friend", or anyone else you are to the people whose lives you impact and who love you. But that is okay, because we are needed! It is the "simple" people in this world that have been willing to listen and obey God's calling, that have made it what it is! The Christ Followers, the willing vessels, the chosen ones!! YES YOU ARE A CHOSEN CHILD OF GOD!! If my only purpose in this life is to raise my children to love, obey and serve Christ, and to love my husband the way God tells me too in His Word and show Him the love of Christ, then I will follow through with my orders gladly! Though in my heart, I would love to do more, I am content in knowing, He may need me to "just" be who I am now! Be careful not to take your "job" in this world lightly. God is precise and He has a sovereign and divine purpose for placing you exactly where you are at exactly this time! Let us not miss the opportunity to be "simply" HIS by trying to be more than He ever desired us to be.
I will take every opportunity presented to me to share the love of Christ to those around me, at the grocery store, at the bank, at the gas station, at the USPS....wherever I am, whoever I am in contact with, I will be that willing vessel for you Lord! I will be an "extra" in YOUR show Lord and I thank You for allowing me too!
Other "extras" in God's show....see how His purpose was carried through with these "simple" people...
Judges 4 the story of Deborah the Judge chosen by God.... I wonder...did she have parents? Friends? spiritual influences in her life? OF COURSE SHE DID!! and without them, she would not have been the person she was!
Luke 1:46 Mary, the mother of Christ, begins praising God for what He is doing in her life. But can I please bring your attention to Mary's parents.... Oh wait, they are not mentioned! Does that mean they were not important? NO!! Someone raised Mary, someone taught her all the things she knew about God and His love and His law! For her to be able to praise Him the way she does in the next 9 verses, she had to have someone in her life teach her those things...prepare her for what she was about to embark upon! (see where I am going)
We all have people in our lives that affect us in one way or another, whether good or bad. But, if we allow God, He will use it for good and you never know who you may be influencing!
Do you think Ruth knew, that in her obedience, when she lay at Boaz feet what the REAL impact would be? That it would lead her to be the great great great great great (well, you get the picture) grandmother of JESUS!!!!
There are countless other stories you can think of and examples of "extras" who have assisted along the way in allowing the "major" events to take place!
Simple obedience...that is my purpose!
What is your purpose?
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
My Jesus, My God
Okay, so I like to blog about what God is doing in my life. For some reason, right now I think it is really important for me to write these things down so I never forget them. There have been so many seasons in my life when I needed spiritual reminding, and now I can get them. I can just read my blog and remember what God is doing!
For some reason the last couple of days, the subject of the trinity has really been on my heart. And not so much the trinity, as God the Father and God the Son. I have been reading in the OT for the last few weeks and as I blogged earlier this week, just really falling in love with the person of God. Well, where does that leave Jesus? Last night, I bought a new devotional book titled "90 Days with the One and Only" by Beth Moore. First of all, I am just a sucker for devotionals that ask you questions and give you room to write and offer opportunity to dig deeper. Secondly, I am a huge sucker for Beth Moore anything. That lady just has a hunger and heart for God's Word that is like no other.
Now, dont get all religious and like "I can't believe she is admitting this" when you read these next paragraphs, because I am just being honest. When I sat down and started reading the introduction, Mrs Moore was talking about how after I am done with this devotion, I will be totally in love with Jesus and He will be my best friend. Immediately after reading that my thought was, "Where does that leave God?" "I thought He was going to be my best friend" I just got really confused. I know they are supposed to be the same and they Bible clearly states that Jesus was fully God. But when I really sat down and thought about having Him/them as my best friend, I didn't know which one to chose. So, I did the practical thing....I prayed. I read. I talked and I listened. (for some of you this may be so simple, but for me, it was mind boggling)
Are the God of the OT and the Jesus of the NT the same person? Is God who was Abraham and David's best friend the same Jesus that was best friends with Mary and Martha and Lazarus? When I pray and I say, "Dear Heavenly Father..." and then end with "....in Jesus name Amen" am I praying to one God? Well, I know now without a doubt the answer to these questions are all "YES"!! He is the same God. And Jesus was God's son and yet fully God. While I may not be able to wrap my brain around how that is possible, I know that it is true! Wanna know how I know???
Because God says so!!! Don't you just love that? How many times do we tell our kids "Because I said so." And how many times do we say that because we know even if we explain it to them they will not understand. I honestly believe that is how it is with us in these earthly bodies and with our earthly minds. We are like little children that just cannot understand "why" but we know it is truth because HE says so! And He has never lied to us before!!
So, when I am learning about and falling in love with the God of the OT, it is the same Jesus who came and walked and lived and died for me in the NT. And when I am learning about and falling in love with the Jesus of the NT, it is the same God who created me and knew me before the foundation of the world. And while I may not understand how....I am just thankful that He is!
(and not to leave out the Holy Spirit, but that is just easier for me to get, but I wholeheartedly believe the Comforter, is also fully God (and Jesus) dwelling in spirit here with me now ;) )
For some reason the last couple of days, the subject of the trinity has really been on my heart. And not so much the trinity, as God the Father and God the Son. I have been reading in the OT for the last few weeks and as I blogged earlier this week, just really falling in love with the person of God. Well, where does that leave Jesus? Last night, I bought a new devotional book titled "90 Days with the One and Only" by Beth Moore. First of all, I am just a sucker for devotionals that ask you questions and give you room to write and offer opportunity to dig deeper. Secondly, I am a huge sucker for Beth Moore anything. That lady just has a hunger and heart for God's Word that is like no other.
Now, dont get all religious and like "I can't believe she is admitting this" when you read these next paragraphs, because I am just being honest. When I sat down and started reading the introduction, Mrs Moore was talking about how after I am done with this devotion, I will be totally in love with Jesus and He will be my best friend. Immediately after reading that my thought was, "Where does that leave God?" "I thought He was going to be my best friend" I just got really confused. I know they are supposed to be the same and they Bible clearly states that Jesus was fully God. But when I really sat down and thought about having Him/them as my best friend, I didn't know which one to chose. So, I did the practical thing....I prayed. I read. I talked and I listened. (for some of you this may be so simple, but for me, it was mind boggling)
Are the God of the OT and the Jesus of the NT the same person? Is God who was Abraham and David's best friend the same Jesus that was best friends with Mary and Martha and Lazarus? When I pray and I say, "Dear Heavenly Father..." and then end with "....in Jesus name Amen" am I praying to one God? Well, I know now without a doubt the answer to these questions are all "YES"!! He is the same God. And Jesus was God's son and yet fully God. While I may not be able to wrap my brain around how that is possible, I know that it is true! Wanna know how I know???
Because God says so!!! Don't you just love that? How many times do we tell our kids "Because I said so." And how many times do we say that because we know even if we explain it to them they will not understand. I honestly believe that is how it is with us in these earthly bodies and with our earthly minds. We are like little children that just cannot understand "why" but we know it is truth because HE says so! And He has never lied to us before!!
So, when I am learning about and falling in love with the God of the OT, it is the same Jesus who came and walked and lived and died for me in the NT. And when I am learning about and falling in love with the Jesus of the NT, it is the same God who created me and knew me before the foundation of the world. And while I may not understand how....I am just thankful that He is!
(and not to leave out the Holy Spirit, but that is just easier for me to get, but I wholeheartedly believe the Comforter, is also fully God (and Jesus) dwelling in spirit here with me now ;) )
Sunday, February 6, 2011
God.....someONE, not someTHING
I am stealing this title from something my pastor said in one of his sermons a few months back. He said that we (speaking of Christians) often make the mistake of seeing God as someTHING and not someONE. Can we just take a minute to let that soak in? I mean, wow! What a huge mistake to make!! And it is one I am VERY guilty of. For me, it has always been difficult to picture God as anything less than a huge, mighty, forceful being that reins supreme in all realms of space/time/reality etc...and while He is DEFINITELY all those things, He is not only those things.
While reading the OT, I came across some phrases that just stood out and struck me. They are statements like, "and God heard", and "God grieved" and "God looked". I started wondering why God, who is infinite and always, needs to hear/grieve/look. In fact, why does He respond at all the way He does to the people in the OT? Then, that statement was brought back to my mind. Because He is someONE!
Genesis clearly states we are made in His image! He made us like Him. Joe Buck (a dear family friend/student of God's word) recently said to me, "we love, because He loves...we are compassionate, because He is compassionate....we grieve, because He grieves....we care, because He cares" All the things about us that make us the "person" that we are, are because that is who He is! (of course ours have been marred by sin and our sin-nature...but you get what I mean)
God is completely affected by us! Read in all the OT books how His mind and heart would change because of the prayers of His faithful. Look, really look, at the relationship He had with Abraham and David and others. He was their FRIEND. I mean, Abraham felt close enough to God, to roll on the floor laughing when God told him he was going to bless him and Sarah with a son. ROLLED ON THE FLOOR!!! (Gen 17:17) and God did not strike him down, or even scold him. Can you imagine having that kind of closeness, intimacy and friendship with God? That is what I am desperate for!
I am desperate to KNOW the person God and He wants me too! So much so that He sent His Son to die so I could forever be with Him!! To really sit back and dwell on that is almost too much to bear! But it is so much easier to understand Him when I really consider He is a someONE and I almost can't wait to see what He shows me next in His word!!
While reading the OT, I came across some phrases that just stood out and struck me. They are statements like, "and God heard", and "God grieved" and "God looked". I started wondering why God, who is infinite and always, needs to hear/grieve/look. In fact, why does He respond at all the way He does to the people in the OT? Then, that statement was brought back to my mind. Because He is someONE!
Genesis clearly states we are made in His image! He made us like Him. Joe Buck (a dear family friend/student of God's word) recently said to me, "we love, because He loves...we are compassionate, because He is compassionate....we grieve, because He grieves....we care, because He cares" All the things about us that make us the "person" that we are, are because that is who He is! (of course ours have been marred by sin and our sin-nature...but you get what I mean)
God is completely affected by us! Read in all the OT books how His mind and heart would change because of the prayers of His faithful. Look, really look, at the relationship He had with Abraham and David and others. He was their FRIEND. I mean, Abraham felt close enough to God, to roll on the floor laughing when God told him he was going to bless him and Sarah with a son. ROLLED ON THE FLOOR!!! (Gen 17:17) and God did not strike him down, or even scold him. Can you imagine having that kind of closeness, intimacy and friendship with God? That is what I am desperate for!
I am desperate to KNOW the person God and He wants me too! So much so that He sent His Son to die so I could forever be with Him!! To really sit back and dwell on that is almost too much to bear! But it is so much easier to understand Him when I really consider He is a someONE and I almost can't wait to see what He shows me next in His word!!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
It's Saturday and it's a blessing :)
So today is Saturday. Nothing special. Just a day, with no plans. But it is days like this that I am able to sit back and really SEE my blessings. As I am typing, I am sitting at the kitchen table and McKain is here too. He has his Legos that he has made into a submarine/destroyer and apparently Darth Vader is manning the ship. He is making these great noises with his mouth as he is talking to and for the Legos. Watching his little mind at work, taking these tiny pieces apart and then re-arranging them and putting them back together in a way I could have NEVER figured out, is a blessing. My husband is sitting on the couch reading his Bible. That's right, the Bible. It's 5:15 on Saturday, and he is just sitting over there intently reading. Some of you reading may be thinking, what? But for me, this is a HUGE blessing! The fact that reading his Bible is so important to him, that he will do it any free moment he has, literally melts my heart and makes me fall in love with him all over again. (by the way, McKain just told me Darth Vader came out of his body suit because his whole ship blew up and he has no leg...ha) PW is asleep....and we all know how precious they are when they are asleep. And Samantha is with her Papa and Gigi on their way to take April and her crew home (more of my amazing blessings)
It is on days like today (which are rare) that I am able to take some time and just appreciate the simple blessings in my life. I used to always wonder why God allowed me to be born in the US and not in Ethiopia. Why I was born into a family that does not live in poverty? Why was I not born into a family that sales their children into slavery just to feed the rest of their family? I still do not have the answers to those questions, but I do know my God and I know He does not do anything without a purpose. His purpose. I remember the Bible verse that says to whom much is given, much is expected.(Luke 12:48) This verse is not just referring to material things. It is refering to love, joy, knowledge, peace, forgiveness, grace, and the list goes on. (Luke 7:47)( As I sit back and observe all the blessings I have been given, I think about how much more I am expected to give. How much love have I been given? How much peace? How much FORGIVENESS? How much joy? How much grace? and how much of these things do I give back? Do I/we really have a lot to be thankful for? When we say we are blessed, what do we really mean? and do we consider what is expected of those of us who are TRULY blessed? Do we think about HOW we are blessed in each and every aspect of our lives?
I know, as good as most, how easy it is to get lost in the everyday life stuff. I know how easy it is to let one, two or even 50 bumps in the day, ruin the whole mood of the day. But I am trying more and more, to take those moments as they come, and give them to God. Let Him manage them, handle them and deal with them how He sees fit, and then go on with my day serving, praising and obeying Him. I just do not want to get so wrapped up in the bumps that I forget about the blessings or the expectations! I am blessed and because of that I am expected to be a blessing.....so, am I?
It is on days like today (which are rare) that I am able to take some time and just appreciate the simple blessings in my life. I used to always wonder why God allowed me to be born in the US and not in Ethiopia. Why I was born into a family that does not live in poverty? Why was I not born into a family that sales their children into slavery just to feed the rest of their family? I still do not have the answers to those questions, but I do know my God and I know He does not do anything without a purpose. His purpose. I remember the Bible verse that says to whom much is given, much is expected.(Luke 12:48) This verse is not just referring to material things. It is refering to love, joy, knowledge, peace, forgiveness, grace, and the list goes on. (Luke 7:47)( As I sit back and observe all the blessings I have been given, I think about how much more I am expected to give. How much love have I been given? How much peace? How much FORGIVENESS? How much joy? How much grace? and how much of these things do I give back? Do I/we really have a lot to be thankful for? When we say we are blessed, what do we really mean? and do we consider what is expected of those of us who are TRULY blessed? Do we think about HOW we are blessed in each and every aspect of our lives?
I know, as good as most, how easy it is to get lost in the everyday life stuff. I know how easy it is to let one, two or even 50 bumps in the day, ruin the whole mood of the day. But I am trying more and more, to take those moments as they come, and give them to God. Let Him manage them, handle them and deal with them how He sees fit, and then go on with my day serving, praising and obeying Him. I just do not want to get so wrapped up in the bumps that I forget about the blessings or the expectations! I am blessed and because of that I am expected to be a blessing.....so, am I?
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Where does it go.....TIME??
Okay, so I am definitely NOT the best blogger. I really had no idea it had been so long since I wrote something....and I was supposed to be doing this for me to remember? Yeah, right!!
What's been going on for the last two months?....so much I can scarcely wrap my brain around it!
One thing I know I can say for sure, and that is God is moving in my life and in the life of my family! We have recently joined a church, (when I say recent, I mean in the last few months) and when I say I am met by the Holy Spirit every time I walk through the doors, I mean it! It doesn't matter what I am involved in, be it CLG (Christian Life Group...or Sunday School for us old time Baptist :) ), Worship service, choir practice, or just hanging out. If the Word of God is being taught, read or spoken...God shows up. It is beyond anything I could every describe with my mere words. All I can recommend is if you are not in a church, find one, QUICKLY and do not be satisfied with mediocre Christianity! Find one where the whole church is determined to be different, to live in the world but not be OF the world. If you ARE in a church, and you are not experiencing God, then be the one to change it! Pray, like you never have before, on your face! Beg God for a fire to ignite in the hearts of the people in your church and in the leadership! God is only looking for one willing person, who is humble and is hungry for truth! He WILL use you!
God is no longer someone we live for only on Sundays and Wednesday nights or in my own personal quiet time. He is our EVERY moment! From before my feet touch the floor, til I lay my head down at night! HE is who I am thinking of, talking to, telling my kids about, and who we are serving. And can I say...I am LIBERATED! I pray that the way I am now, only changes for the better. I never want to go back to being a mediocre Christian! It is not okay anymore! Not for me, and not for my family! I no longer want to read God's Word just to say I read it. I want to read it and KNOW it...understand it....live it! I want to research it, dig in and hold on! I pray that God will reveal Himself to me over and over like never before!
For the first time this morning, the kids and I got down, together, on our hands and knees before God and we prayed! If only I could have captured that moment in time. How willing they were to do it, without question, without shame. When I told them what we were going to do and why...they simply did it. At that moment, in their innocence, I realized how blind I have been. That is EXACTLY what God wants from me! Willing, unquestionable, shameless faith!! To fall on my face before Him simply because He is!
If any of you get a chance, please visit my pastor's blog...www.feelmyfaith.com. He is an amazing writer! He also is an amazing pastor! He recently said something that has really resonated with me. He is preaching on Wednesday nights about Islam and the differences between Islam and Christianity. He made the statement that "Muslims pray 5 times a day! They stop what they are doing, wherever they are, EVERY day...FIVE TIMES A DAY! How many of us Christians do that? How many of us spend 5 minutes in prayer a day?" It just hit me, for God to be number one in my life, I cant just "say" He is number one....I have to LITERALLY make Him number one. This will take a lot of work on my part, but I am ready and willing and with His help...I know it will happen!
So, I know this hasn't necessarily been a blog about the cute things the kids have done, but this is a moment in time I never want to forget. A moment when I know God is changing me! And please, don't let me mislead you...Satan is attacking like never before. I am being bombarded with hurt and suffering and trials...but that is just all the more proof that God is moving!
"Thank you Lord for saving my soul, thank you Lord for making me whole, thank you Lord for giving to me....thy Great SALVATION so rich and free"
What's been going on for the last two months?....so much I can scarcely wrap my brain around it!
One thing I know I can say for sure, and that is God is moving in my life and in the life of my family! We have recently joined a church, (when I say recent, I mean in the last few months) and when I say I am met by the Holy Spirit every time I walk through the doors, I mean it! It doesn't matter what I am involved in, be it CLG (Christian Life Group...or Sunday School for us old time Baptist :) ), Worship service, choir practice, or just hanging out. If the Word of God is being taught, read or spoken...God shows up. It is beyond anything I could every describe with my mere words. All I can recommend is if you are not in a church, find one, QUICKLY and do not be satisfied with mediocre Christianity! Find one where the whole church is determined to be different, to live in the world but not be OF the world. If you ARE in a church, and you are not experiencing God, then be the one to change it! Pray, like you never have before, on your face! Beg God for a fire to ignite in the hearts of the people in your church and in the leadership! God is only looking for one willing person, who is humble and is hungry for truth! He WILL use you!
God is no longer someone we live for only on Sundays and Wednesday nights or in my own personal quiet time. He is our EVERY moment! From before my feet touch the floor, til I lay my head down at night! HE is who I am thinking of, talking to, telling my kids about, and who we are serving. And can I say...I am LIBERATED! I pray that the way I am now, only changes for the better. I never want to go back to being a mediocre Christian! It is not okay anymore! Not for me, and not for my family! I no longer want to read God's Word just to say I read it. I want to read it and KNOW it...understand it....live it! I want to research it, dig in and hold on! I pray that God will reveal Himself to me over and over like never before!
For the first time this morning, the kids and I got down, together, on our hands and knees before God and we prayed! If only I could have captured that moment in time. How willing they were to do it, without question, without shame. When I told them what we were going to do and why...they simply did it. At that moment, in their innocence, I realized how blind I have been. That is EXACTLY what God wants from me! Willing, unquestionable, shameless faith!! To fall on my face before Him simply because He is!
If any of you get a chance, please visit my pastor's blog...www.feelmyfaith.com. He is an amazing writer! He also is an amazing pastor! He recently said something that has really resonated with me. He is preaching on Wednesday nights about Islam and the differences between Islam and Christianity. He made the statement that "Muslims pray 5 times a day! They stop what they are doing, wherever they are, EVERY day...FIVE TIMES A DAY! How many of us Christians do that? How many of us spend 5 minutes in prayer a day?" It just hit me, for God to be number one in my life, I cant just "say" He is number one....I have to LITERALLY make Him number one. This will take a lot of work on my part, but I am ready and willing and with His help...I know it will happen!
So, I know this hasn't necessarily been a blog about the cute things the kids have done, but this is a moment in time I never want to forget. A moment when I know God is changing me! And please, don't let me mislead you...Satan is attacking like never before. I am being bombarded with hurt and suffering and trials...but that is just all the more proof that God is moving!
"Thank you Lord for saving my soul, thank you Lord for making me whole, thank you Lord for giving to me....thy Great SALVATION so rich and free"
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