I am struggling to write this second part. It's 2:33am and I can't sleep. I'm actually not sure when I will sleep again. There is so much going on in my head and my heart I am not sure I can even put it on paper... (or on a computer screen in this case)
I spent most of the night crying and trying to hide my tears from Yuri. Not big, ugly crying, just subtle tears streaming.... The thought of sending him back was an overwhelming reality tonight. I have known from the beginning that he had to go back at the end of the summer. I even cried a few nights before he got here thinking about it. But now that he is here, it's different.
He's here.
I can't explain the love I have for this child. There is no logical explanation. The only thing that makes sense is that God has put it there. He has orchestrated this whole thing. From the beginning, I can see His hand moving on behalf of Y and for His own glory, as all things are and should be. I clearly felt Him say to me tonight, "pain is a part of it".....as I was pleading with Him to help me overcome this and enjoy the time he is here for now. Pain is always a part of the beautifying process with our loving God. It's in the brokenness that He makes things beautiful. He takes our tattered and torn lives and weaves a beautiful tapestry for His glory. Our strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor 12:9) and it's then we realize we are completely dependent upon Him for our every need....
I said in my blog a few days ago that I could feel change was coming.... Well it's just beginning. And not just for me, but for my whole family. I am not the only one that loves Y. We all do. He is already changing our dynamic. The way we talk to each other. The way we look at each other. The way we love each other. In just one short weekend, he has already had an effect that will last a lifetime. And it's only the beginning....
God is using Y to show us what genuine love looks like. Real I Corinthians 13 love. I don't think it is any coincidence that we started memorizing that chapter as a family a few weeks ago... Just another way of how God is sovereign over all.
Okay... I am going to try and finish the first day story...
So, after we leave the airport, we all load up in our van (which has a donut tire on now because of the flat that occurred on the way there) and head home. At first Samantha, McKain and Y were in the back seat. Not 5 minutes down the road, I decided I wanted to sit in the back with him so I could talk to him (or talk to my phone so it could talk to him), so Samantha and I switched. (which she was thrilled to do... NOT) About 5 minutes later, Parker had to pee. Stop #1
We all go in the gas station and McKain shows Y around and tells him to pick anything he wants.... He picks a huge chocolate, caramel, granola bar thing and a Coke Zero.... I looked at the drink and tried to explain that it was a diet drink and maybe he wanted a "real" Coke... He conceded, I am sure just to shut me up. Haha So back in the car we go.... and 10 minutes later... (really it was, not kidding) Parker has to pee AGAIN... Stop #2
Well, there is no exit with gas stations and Parker is really whining at this point. Like he is going to die. It's about 9:15 and he has had a long day with WAY too much to drink. Sammy tries to talk me in to letting him pee in a bottle in the car. (something we have done in the past) But I adamantly argue I will not do that in front of Y his first night here and scare him to death thinking we are some sort of crazy parents who make their children pee in bottles..... I can't even imagine what that would look like to him.... Did I mention we were almost sitting still in traffic??
Sammy very slowly makes his way to the next exit (which has no gas stations) He drives a little way, makes a couple of turns, and finally just pulls into an empty parking lot and lets Parker out and then we pulled off quickly so he couldn't follow..... (kidding)
At this point we are all tired. Y is already tired of google translate and Sammy is beyond ready to get home and get away from our two youngest who have consistently whined and cried for the last 4 hours.... We make our way back to the interstate ramp only to notice it is blocked by a state trooper. We talk to the State Trooper who tells us the road is closed and we will have to take 75 turns to get through the town and back to the interstate on down a few miles or we can go back the way we came and get back on the interstate a few exits back and wait in traffic... we chose 75 turns... Well as we are pulling away from the ST... Y takes off his seatbelt and proceeds to get up... I am trying to ask him what is wrong. I was sure he was going to be sick... I was yelling for Sammy to pull over because he was trying to get out and to hand me something because I thought he was going to be sick... (one of the things P143 told us was to be prepared for motion sickness as most of these children have never traveled for long distances) I just knew me and my entire van were about to be covered in.... well you know.... I empty the bag that I had the chips in and Samantha throws back a ziplock... (thanks Samantha) I hand him the chip bag and he looks at me really strange... I nod like "yes, it's okay" then he proceeds to stand up and act like he is going to unbutton his pants.... Of corse I am calm and say "no, no, that's not what I meant".... Ha! No, I started yelling "NOOOO, NOOOO don't do that!!" He says "Ohhhh, Ohhhh, Okay" Then I yell for Sammy to pull over now because he has got to go.... He pulls over right across from the exit where we had just spoke with the ST and let's Y out with McKain as his chaperone of corse.... Desperate times call for desperate measures....
Again, we got back on the road. Our two hour trip home became 3 but we made it.
Y did end up falling asleep for the last hour and a half and I ended up driving because Sammy was also asleep.... at the wheel.... haha
Once we got home and showed him his room and his things we had bought, I asked him if he wanted to take a shower to which he said "yes" and in my mind I did a happy dance because I did not want him to go to bed without a shower, but I also didn't want to make him feel like he had to take one at 1am!
He was happy about everything I showed him or gave him, but he has been overall very mellow. He reminds me of Sammy. Very laid back. This is a good thing... our family needs some more "laid back" :)
There have been many "first" and many new experiences for all of us and it has been a blast.
He is so kind and respectful. He is helpful and polite. He tries to help me with everything without me even asking.
We have talked a little about where he is from and about his life there. He seems sad when I ask about it so I try not to dig. (which is totally against my nature) but I know when he wants to, he will tell me his story... Until then....Thanks to a precious redeeming God.... We are writing our own.... A brand new one....
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